"Mommy, which one of us is your favorite?"

Sometimes parenting is sweet, loving, fun and easy....then there are times that leave you tired, exhausted, angry or dumbfounded.  Little Ayla (3) is just blowing me away lately with her vocabulary and the things she comes up with...she's definitely our "talker". Eli (almost 5) on the other hand is more of the listener/heartfelt child and really thinks things through (a little background information for the following story!).A few nights ago I was putting the kiddos into the car and Eli asked the question every mom is asked at least once..."Mommy, which one of us is your favorite?" 

When he asked the question I was expecting to open a whole can of worms and an in depth conversation.  I started by responding..."Of course you are all my favorites...."

He interrupted, "But who do you LOOOOVVE the most??" 

"Eli, I love you all the same but for many different reasons.  I love you all because you are my children....I love you because..."

After I tell him what I love about him he interrupts again, "Well Mommy, I love Daddy more and then you." and grins.

Of course the conversation stopped at this point as I was completely dumbfounded (a little jealous) and laughing hysterically. 

I just read this post today that covers the same topic but with a much better ending:)  It's a great little story, so I'd recommend everyone to read this post:

"In Love with Adoption"

Post by Shelley Brown 

Love from our family to yours!

Black and White

Our family was able to get away for a short trip to Polson, MT last week.  It was a great time visiting friends and family in the town which brought us so many happy memories! 

The 12 hour drive was actually quite relaxing and was great time for Bobby and I to get some of our training done...on the way we read "Black Children White Parents: Putting the Pieces Together" by Tonya Moore.  Reading this book opened us up to great conversation and helped us realize some important issues we need to start thinking about (hair/skin care, cultural differences, our judgmental society, answering tough questions, etc)

We've just started the whole adoption process and I've already been asked numerous times how I feel about having a black child.  When we started this process we didn’t have any concerns about this issue as we knew we were called to Ethiopia and know we won’t have any issues loving or accepting a child of another race. 

Living in Dickinson we believe the biggest issue for us will be incorporating the child’s heritage in our life.  Being there is not much cultural diversity in western North Dakota and we do not have any African American friends or family, we will need to work extra hard in finding some good role models for our child(ren).  By reading books such as this, I feel we will be able to learn more about the black culture and what it will take from us to incorporate African culture in our life.   We look forward to teaching our children about various cultures and how to be accepting of others no matter the color of their skin or where they come from.

I can only hope that our community will welcome our adoption with open arms, but realize there will be some who do not favor our choice of a mixed race family and racism will be an issue throughout our lives.  We hope to show others the love we have for ALL people and hope that our family can be an example for others in our community.  

I know this topic will be addressed over and over again and will be the topic of many blog posts in the future.  I would recommend this book to EVERY white parent adopting a black child or even grandparents and close relatives!  I believe that by continually educating ourselves and living our lives through love, we can be effective parents of any race!

The fact is there are millions of orphans around the world waiting for a forever family.  We do believe and acknowledge that the perfect situation would have all children in a healthly home with their biological parents.  BUT, there are millions of children from various countries/races without their biological families.  There are MILLIONS of children waiting to be adopted in Ethiopia and God has trusted us in raising one of those children. 

Love from our family to yours!

The End of Anxiety?!?

Well, we received some bummer news this week.  Some of you may recall me saying that the adoption process for Ethiopia is slowing down.  We just received word from our family coordinator that if we have our dossier sent by Sep/Oct we should expect to get a referral between September 2012 and April 2013...there goes the 7-11 month referral wait.  We happened to pick Ethiopia and sign an agreement right as this was all starting to change.  We knew this could happen when we made our decision but truly know this is where God has led us.  We will continue to pray that the process in Ethiopia speeds up again and for the MOWYCA (Ministry of Women Youth and Children's Affairs).

I've realized that putting your complete faith and trust in the Lord is not easy.  Too often I have worries and concerns in my life in which I feel I can handle myself.  Too often  I challenge God's power.  In the past year or so I have worked hard at putting God first and foremost in my every day happenings.  The more aware I am of Him in my life, the more I have realized that He is in control of EVERYTHING. 

I can't help but think about what George Muller said, "The beginning of anxiety is the end of faith.  The beginning of true faith is the end of anxiety."

Even though this seems to be bummer news, we will wait for this child(ren) as long as needed to bring them HOME!  We have been blessed beyond measure already and I cannot wait to see how this story unfolds.  Just this week God has done amazing things to help us move forward!  We sold about 20 tshirts in the past week, received a check in the mail that we have NO CLUE where it came from, and just today we received a donation from a classmate of mine whom I haven't seen or had contact with (other than Facebook!) since high school--HOW AMAZING!!! (and THANK YOU!!!)

Last night I was able to connect with a lady from Bismarck (just 100 miles away) who has adopted two children from Ethiopia.  Listening to her story and her heart for the orphans made this news hurt even more.  It's so hard to hear about the conditions that MILLIONS of children are in right now.  She told me that for every 1 child that is adopted from Ethiopia there is 2,000 more children waiting.  BUT hearing her story and being able to connect with someone "locally" was GREAT!  We are hoping to meet their family someday soon and look forward to the connections God has in store for us! 

Even though this wait is going to be long and cumbersome, I will not stop being an advocate for orphaned children.  Please take a few minutes to check out this blog!!!  What Kelly is doing for orphans is unbelievable and the stories of their time in Ethiopia (RIGHT NOW) are life-changing!

Off to enjoy a relaxing weekend with friends and family!  Looking forward to a campfire tonight, possibly fishing tomorrow, and our neighbor's birthday/movie night tomorrow night!  We have so much to be grateful for... may we continually to look at the millions of blessings we have and not be led astray by the few mishaps and discomforts!

Love from our family to YOURS!

The Road Ahead...

Our wonderful social worker came for another Home Study meeting yesterday!  She will be coming back on Sunday and then we are DONE WITH OUR HOME STUDY!!!  (well, other than waiting for the background checks to be cleared---no skeletons in any closets here so we should be clear!).

Here is a little update on how things are panning out and what is to come from here:

1. Wait for background checks to get cleared and finish our 20 hours of training (about one month)... during this wait we will get our garage cleaned out so we can have our garage sale!!

2. As soon as the background checks are done the home study will be officially completed and we can send it off to the US Government (USCIS--United States Citizenship and Immigration Services) with our I-600A form (basically a form that says we are cleared to bring an orphan to the US and have them legally join our family). 

3. Wait for I-600 to get passed (usually takes around 8 weeks) and apply for grants.

4. Send our dossier (complete pack of paperwork for our adoption) to AWAA for approval, then it will be translated and send to ETHIOPIA--(that date is commonly known as your DTE--Dossier to Ethiopia)!!  $7,700 is required when we send our dossier off--watch our fundraising thermometer and funds tracker to see how God is working in this process!

5. Officially on the wait list for our baby girl or sibling group! (will know a better time frame when we reach this point but as of now they are expecting  a 7-11 month wait time for a referral)

6. Receive/accept a referral and wait for a court date.  Pay referral and travel fees (approximately $17,000)

7. Trip 1: travel to Ethiopia to meet child(ren) and appear in court

8. Return home and wait for everything to process (I imagine this will be the hardest part of this entire journey!!)

9. Trip 2: travel back to Ethiopia to complete paperwork and bring our child(ren) HOME!!!

Just a little insight for those of you who are following our story and don't know exactly how the adoption process works.  I'm asked almost daily how old our little girl is and what her name is.  People (including me just a few short months ago!!) don't know how much time and energy goes into adopting a child.  It's sad that this much wait time is involved when there are MILLIONS of children waiting, wishing, and hoping.  We just lay this all before the Lord, ask for His guidance, and wait patiently....
Psalm 27:14 Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the LordIf you'd like to read about the Ethiopian program through America World Adoption, click here:

Love from our family to yours!

T-Shirt SALE !!

Well we are half-way there!  Our goal is to sell 100 t-shirts (ordered 120!) and we have currently sold 60!! 

Our adoption journey has been such an eye opener to the orphan crisis around the world.  Our family is committed to being advocates for this cause.  The need is astounding and we are privileged to have the opportunity to change lives of fatherless children. 

I've dropped the prices of our shirts, as I feel the need to raise awareness is greater than the need for our family to quickly raise the funds we need to send off our dossier.  I agree that adoption, foster care, and mission trips aren't necessarily for everyone.  But EVERYONE can be used by advocating for orphans around the world!

Click on the links on the right or shoot me a message/email if you're within delivering distance!

Plans to Give you Hope and a Future

Dossier work update:Passports renewed...check (wait to get back!)
Hague training....check
Background checks...check (wait to get back!)
Employment letters...check
Physicals...check
Application letter to MOWCYA...check
Home study underway...check


To do list:
Financial Statement
Round up last couple of reference letters
Start AAU training
Bobby finish Autobiography
Finish Home Study
Wait, wait, wait :)


The list is definitely getting smaller!  We have been feeling God's hand among us this week!  We got good news about our passports (less money and work than we thought we had to do!) and had a very great group of people join us for our Fundraising Dinner.  We have raised exactly how much we need to pay for our Home Study!  Now we will be working toward our Dossier payment which will be right around $7,800.  I know God is definitely on our side and will be moving mountains as we continue to work toward bringing our little girl HOME!! 


It's so easy to get caught up in the paperwork and fundraising of adoption that I need to bring myself back to the cause and reason behind this process! 

I strive to have the faith and love of our children.  Little Eli and Ayla are constantly reminding us to pray for our daughter and to include her in our family even now, before she is with us or possibly even born!  The other night we were sitting at the dinner table and we asked Ayla how many people are in our family (simply asking as she LOVES to count things lately)...she started around the dinner table and counted, "1...2...3...4....5....and my baby sister is 6!!"  I don't know why I was shocked at her response as she is infatuated in the idea of having a baby sister...but it warmed my heart tremendously to be put into perspective by a THREE YEAR OLD!  We ARE a family of 6...a family that God created and has wonderful plans for. 

We are reminded in Jeremiah that God has plans for us...He has hope and a future planned for our little girl and for many other orphans around the world who are waiting to be brought home to forever families.  I continue to pray for the orphans of this world...and just as much I pray for the Christians of this world who CAN make a difference in the life of children who are starving, left alone, helpless, hurt, and crying out.Jeremiah 29:11- "For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord. Plans to prosper not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

 

As we celebrated adding members to our family this past weekend and celebrated the Freedom we have in America, I can't help but dream of the day we will bring our daughter (or children) home from Ethiopia.  How they too will join our family and will be gaining freedom they wouldn't have if we weren't called to bring them HOME.

Love from our family to yours!