Now What?

A lot of people have been asking us the dreaded question lately....

So, when will you be travelling?

I wish I could give some clear cut answers or even understand the process completely myself. International adoption is NEVER clear-cut!
 
What I can share is what is left in the process for us (as far as I understand it)...

We received written judgment that the judge in the DRC has given us the stamp of approval to adopt Addy.

Right now we are waiting for all the documents to come in WITH NO ERRORS, so we can file our I-600 to the US government and get approval to make Addy a US citizen. Those documents (birth certificate, passport, judgment, etc) are currently being translated from French to English and then they’ll be sent in. Once sent in it typically takes 3-4 weeks to get the I-600 back.
 
After we get the I-600 back from the US gov, it will be sent to the DRC for the LBB staff to make appointments with the DGM (their immigration officers). There are two DGM appointments:

1)     Pre-Approval, visa process (befrore we travel, a rep will be there for us)
Usually 2 weeks after I-600 approval

2)     2. Exit Letter (the appointment we need to attend)
This appointment is usually 1 week after 1st DGM appointment

We are estimating (and praying, praying, praying) to travel
in 10 weeks:

·         1 more week to finalize documents and get I-600 sent

·         4 weeks to get I-600 back

·         2 weeks for DGM appointment #1

·         1 week for DGM appointment #2

·         2 weeks for wiggle room

That still means there is a possibility we COULD travel in August. Keep in mind that these are ESTIMATES and some people end up waiting 6 weeks for their I-600....some wait 4 weeks for their DGM appointments. So again, we are asking you to lift our family up in prayers.

v  Please pray that things go as planned.

v  Pray her documents have no errors.

v  Pray that appointments are made in a timely order.

v  Pray that we travel in AUGUST

v  And ALWAYS be praying for Addy’s health and safety

 So what do I do in the wait?!?!?!??!

GET READY FOR MY SWEET DAUGHTER!

Yesterday mom and I went to Bismarck and did some ADDY SHOPPING!

Formula (EXPENSIVE!)
Diapers
Bottles
Hair/Skin Care
Clothing
Etc, etc

Addy's Loot from Yesterday 

 Addy's closet all ready and waiting...

Have a great weekend all!

YOU ARE OURS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Whining. Complaining. Crying. Comparing. Being jealous.

My last few days have had MORE THAN ENOUGH of those things! And I have to say....

I AM SORRY GOD!!!!

I did not mean to put on such a front to get what you have given. My ranting, raving, and not believing in you fully was unnecessary!

Just yesterday I had such a sad, downcast post about my honest feelings.....and TODAY our God has reminded me that I must be patient and fully trust in Him.

CAN YOU BELIEVE IT....

TODAY I GOT WORD THAT WE HAVE RECEIVED JUDGMENT!!!

AND

TODAY WE GOT MORE NEW PHOTOS OF OUR PRECIOUS ADDY.

 I have so much to say right now but we are headed out the door and there is NO WAY I was not going to share after so many of you gave me encouragement yesterday and have been praying for our family!

Addy, you are PRECIOUS and you are LOVED soooooooooooo very much. We CANNOT wait to have you home. You CRACK ME UP...I can't help but just laugh when I look at your photos...you with your tongue out and your chubby belly (which I pray and believe is from being well cared for, not malnutrition). And you know what sweet baby girl...

 YOU ARE OURS
Addy Rose Williams!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My heart is full.  My God is so great.

Half-Empty Optimism

It's been two weeks since I posted....a lot has happened in our lives over the past two weeks but unfortunately not much on the side of GETTING ADDY HOME. We've celebrated birthdays (Mom's, Owen's 2nd, my cousin Jace's), had VBS, I had new teacher training, AND we've been busy getting our new house going. (adoption updates at the end of this post if that's what you're here for!)

Owen, our clown, celebrated his 2nd birthday on June 1st. I wish everyone in the world would get a full day to spend with this little man. HE IS HILARIOUS, and smart, and loving--definitely a class clown in the making. I can't help but just squish him as he's so stinkin cute and has a way to turn every bad situation into good. 

Vacation Bible School was a long but "oh so worth it" week. Debbie and I were the directors of the toddler group... thirty two 3-4 year olds from 5:30-8:30pm all week.....I'm still sleepy;) It was fun having Ayla in my group again and also fun to have Eli join the bigger kids and tell me all about it late at night. One night while tucking Ayla in, I asked her what her favorite part was:
"THE SHOW" (drama) she quickly replied....then added, "oh and the crafts, and the zoo, and the singing, and the yummy snacks, and Reece (the puppet)." Every morning she'd wake and ask if it was PBS (VBS) time yet. Incrediworld sure helped reinforce to them how awesomely incredible our God is and how the Bible's word is always true.

I am beyond thrilled to have a little time off of work this summer!!!!! I am only working two days in June so for the rest of this month, it's mommy time!! I will go back to working 2 days a week for July and August until we head TO AFRICA TO GET ADDY. With all the new literacy initiatives for our school district, there is a lot of work us coaches have to do this summer. AND, whatever I work this summer will offset my 12 weeks maternity leave, so it's all good:)

 The new house is coming along!!!! It's crazy how Bobby builds houses every day and there is so much of it that I did not know or understand! We got our flatwork poured on Saturday, lumber will be delivered this week, and then Bobby will start framing. He gave me a list of assignments to do today: pick out doors, showers, and faucets and get an appointment made to go over cabinets and siding this week.

Pre-Flatwork

Watching the flatwork being poured (after swimming lessonsJ)

And now for what you're really here for......the adoption process;)

If you've been reading you know we were submitted to court on May 11th. On that day we were told we should expect a 3-4 week wait before we received judgment. On May 29th we received an update stating: I've been notified that your case is currently on the docket to be approved and finalized at the end of this week or early next.

Now it is June 11th and we have yet to hear anything about our case (while we get update after update from other families who have received judgment). I'm being honest when I say I am extremely discouraged! And while I'm being honest, I must say I am sick of people saying, "God's timing is perfect" or "it's worth the wait." I am not saying I don't agree with BOTH of those statements...but it's H-A-R-D. I want my baby girl in my arms.

Last week we had a couple of conference calls with our agency. They are changing the process and are no longer going to have families file their I-600 (application to the US to bring Addy here) in the DRC but instead we will be filing it in the US. The reason behind the change is the DRC government is very different than ours and their sense of urgency, practices, etc are so unpredictable. Some families have travelled and ended up staying for 5 weeks. With us filing in the US we may have to wait a little longer to travel to the Congo, but our "homecoming" date will not change. Instead of being in country for 3-5 weeks, we will only be in country for 3-5 DAYS. As hard as the wait is, that timeframe helps us out tremendously. Not only is it VERY expensive to stay in the DRC, but we are also leaving behind our three rugrats...and 3+ weeks is just too long.

I know most are now wondering what that means for our timeframe...and I'm not going there today! I'm having an emotional day and honestly, I HAVE NO CLUE. Once we receive word on our judgment, I will have a few more answers on the steps from here....but for now, it's back to the "TRYING TO BE PATIENT" game. I tend to believe I am a pretty darn optimistic person....but I'll admit today, my optimism is half-empty;) 

It's one of those days in which I can't seem to imagine the end.  It's a day in which I get mad just thinking of how much of the "firsts" I'm missing in Addy's life.  Babies change soooooo much during these months, and I won't be able to write so many things on our calendar (first smile, first rolled over, first laugh, first food, etc).   Does she sleep through the night?  Does she like being rocked (if she's rocked)?  Is she tickleish?  How big is her smile?  How much does she weight?  What size clothes is she wearing? 

We sent another care package to Addy last week. Praying she gets it and that she will learn to love this little star and the voices of her mommy and daddy singing to her....

With my voice I cry out to the Lord;

with my voice I plead for mercy to the Lord.

I pour out my complaint before Him;

I tell my trouble before Him....

I cry to you, O Lord;

I say, "you are my refuge,

my portion in the land of the living."
Attend to my cry.

Psalm 145

P.S. Sorry about this Half-Empty Optimism post....sometimes it feels good to just be honest and not sugar coat things;)

Love From Our Family to YOURS!

Drum Roll......

I have not once questioned God's hand on our adoption process. Not once. BUT, time and time again He proves to be holding our hands and helping us through this journey.

Here is a snippet of the letter we wrote when we were granted a $4,000 matching grant from Lifesong:

We believe families need to have the monetary needs to care for another child once they are home; but the cost of adoption is overwhelming and too much for almost any family to bear alone. Our goal from the start was to break our funds in thirds: 1/3 from our personal funds, 1/3 through grants/loans, and 1/3 through fundraising/family & friends. Through God’s help we have already spent $33,996 on our two adoptions. We are expecting to have $11,000 more in expenses to get Addy home (visas, passports, travel fees, etc) and about $15,000 left for our Ethiopian adoption.

Will you please consider making a tax-deductible donation to help us pay the remaining $11,000 in adoption expenses to bring Addy home? (our family will continue to save each month for our ET child and believe we can pull the funds together on our own when that adoption becomes a reality).

Our goal date to receive donations was May 22nd (but Lifesong will continue to take donations for us until our children are home). On May 23 I received an email stating our total funds raised thus far. Being it was a $4,000 matching grant, we had really hoped to meet the $4,000.

BUT....

We didn't only meet our goal, it was exceeded. Not only was it exceeded, but it was perfectly planned. If you recall in our letter, we are expecting $11,000 in costs left to bring Addy home......

Our donations total was.....

$6,959

add that to the $4,000 matching grant......

$10,959!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AGAIN God has provided for us and shown us that He is with us. He called our family down this challenging, hard, long, expensive process and He is taking care of us to do the work He has called us to do.

Last week (the same day we got our total) Eli was in the bathroom chatting with me while I got ready for the day. He saw Bobby's wrist band lying on the counter…

"Mommy, what does that say."

"It says Adoption"

"Do you guys want to adopt Addy because she will be cute and make you laugh?"

"Well that will sure be fun, but we are really adopting because God wants us to and the Bible tells us to care for orphans."

"Mom, the word 'orphan' is not in the Bible."

"Well Eli, actually it is. It's in James, Isaiah, Deuteronomy, Psalms, Hosea and many more."

"What does the Bible say about orphans?”

“In a nutshell it tells us to care for orphans just as God cares for us.”

“Oh. Well, if it's in the Bible why doesn't everyone adopt?"

Good question, Eli.

I'm NOT saying I think all are called to adopt and adoption is for everyone. BUT, if you call yourself a God fearing, Christ loving, Bible reading person, you must know where God's heart lies concerning orphans and you must see the importance of Christians standing up to care for them.

IT IS OUR RESPONSIBLITY.

Why do I say all this?

The number one response I get from people about them not choosing to adopt is the monetary concerns.

YES, the money is HUGE.

Yes, it's not easy.

BUT, our story is one amongst thousands in which God has provided to care for an orphaned child.

We fell into that "trap" when we were called to our concurrent adoption.

"God, there is NO WAY we can afford TWO adoptions right now. Its' just NOT POSSIBLE"
"I will be with you." is the response we heard over and over again.

Here we are just 4 months down the road and that funding is not stopping us. Our Addy will be home soon thanks to the support from so many. Some it was $20, some $50...for others it was $200, $500, $1,000 or $5,000. No matter what your contribution may have been, YOU are making a difference.

THANK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF OUR HEARTS.

Our hearts ache and I mean ACHE for the fatherless. We are going to do anything we can to make it our family's mission to care for children who otherwise may have no hope....

After all, our only hope is through Jesus. An orphaned child's only hope is through US, bringing them home and showing them the hope He has shown us.

We are aliens and strangers in your sight, as were all our forefathers. Our days on earth are like a shadow, without hope.         1 Ch 29:15

We continually remember before our God and Father your work produced by faith, your labor prompted by love, and your endurance inspired by hope in our Lord Jesus Christ.          1 Th 1:3

Love from our family to yours!

Summoning Princess Addy

I'm going to be honest and say we requested a baby GIRL when we were called to grow our family through adoption. Not that Ayla wasn't enough, but I grew up with two brothers and have ALWAYS longed for a sister. I still have panging jabs of jealousy now and then of my girlfriends who have sisters and the bond they share as adults. And so it was, for my darling Ayla, we prayed for a sister.


It still gives me the gibbers knowing in a few short months I'm going to be putting two boys AND two girls to bed. That I'll be dressing two boys AND two girls. That I'll be toting all four of them around with me everywhere (yes, I am THAT mom that brings her kids everywhere---sorry checker at Wal-Mart today...little do you know that soon I'll be coming through your line with FOUR whining, crying, wandering children).
When we first knew we were REALLY getting our second daughter, I was a little worried that Ayla would be jealous that her role as "head princess" would be shared.

Man was I wrong!


From the day we told Ayla she was going to be getting a sister, she has prayed and prayed for Addy to come quickly. Ayla is the one that is sure we ALWAYS get Addy something from the store and that Addy's things are well cared for. Ayla is the one that begged and begged to share her room with Addy when we were deciding how to arrange the rooms. Ayla is the one who prays fervently for her sister and is sure to tell EVERYONE that she has a sister on the way.


I got a good laugh when Ayla requested her 4th birthday to be a tea party for GIRLS ONLY. Not because she wanted a tea party...but the whole "girls only" part. Ayla plays with boys 90% of the time and loves her boys so much (you know, being the only girl in a group of boys). Not only did Ayla request a GIRLS tea party (she did allow her brothers to be the servers!!) but she loved every single second of it and made the comment, "soon I won't be the only sister and Addy can be part of my girls' club."

 

We were in Wal-Mart today and saw some cute shiny black boots on clearance (just Ayla's style). When I picked them up and told Ayla they were for Addy, she replied, "Oh yes, Addy will look BEAUTIFUL in those." Not one little hesitation that she was not getting them.
(p.s. they were on clearance for ONE DOLLAR---go grab a pair if you have a baby or toddler girl).


Every day we wait I get nervous that the anticipation will fade for Eli, Ayla, and Owen. Every day they amaze me with the amount of love and understanding they have. They L-O-V-E their sister and count her a part of the family as much as we do.
I cannot wait to have Addy home and to see her personality unfold and see how much she and Ayla are alike and different. I cannot wait to see my children love Addy IN PERSON and to see them interact with each other.


We are praying Addy will be home in July. It is a LONG shot, but we know our God can work miracles!

Here is the easy timeline from now until travel:
We had court on May 12th (ish)
We are currently waiting on written judgment (3-4 weeks from court)
After judgment we have a 30 day wait period and Addy's passports, birth certificate, etc will be processed (30 days minimum)
Embassy appointment (2-3 weeks)

Those are the time frames if everything went 100% smoothly-- on-time and no hiccups....which means the absolute soonest we could travel to bring Addy home is July 15.

BUT, it is not usually that smooth;)
There are typically document errors that need to be fixed and our case is not a priority on the DRC side:) They often take vacations, timelines are very lenient, and delays are often.


PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE join in praying for us. Addy needs your prayers for health and safety....we need your prayers that the remaining process will go smoothly and we will be able to travel in July or August.


Princess Addy, your presence is requested at the Williams home.

SUBMITTED TO COURT!!!

We received an email yesterday that our paperwork has been submitted to the court!! Now we are waiting the verbal and written judgment which should take 3-4 weeks and then our agency can start working on Addy's paperwork (passport, birth certificate, translation, etc) which generally takes around 30 days. 

Once those two steps are done we will be assigned our embassy appointment----WHEN WE TRAVEL TO BRING ADDY HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thank you Lord!!! 

I got the email at almost MIDNIGHT last night.  RIGHT after my girlfriends left after our late night book discussion on 7:An Experimental Mutiny Against Excess.  Part of this week's discussion was on prayer and we discussed trying prayer pauses throughout the day.  One of the suggested prayer pauses is at midnight and we all agreed it would be hard to do as we are hardly ever up that late so we'd basically skip that prayer pause....except last night....I  JUST jumped into bed to start my talk with God and my phone buzzed that I had a new email. 

SO, last night I went to bed AFTER midnight and did my prayer pause with tears FLOWING...and I mean FLOWING down my cheeks. 

The midnight prayer pause is to advocate for others...the suffering, oppressed, abandoned, lonely.

I quickly texted a few of my friends that I received the email and I just KNOW sweet Addy was prayed for by many in that hour of the night!!!! 

 Psalm 119

¹⁴⁵ I call with all my heart; answer me, Lord,
and I will obey your decrees.
¹⁴⁶ I call out to you; save me
and I will keep your statutes.
¹⁴⁷ I rise before dawn and cry for help;
I have put my hope in your word.
¹⁴⁸ My eyes stay open through the watches of the night,
that I may meditate on your promises.
¹⁴⁹ Hear my voice in accordance with your love;
preserve my life, Lord, according to your laws.
¹⁵⁰ Those who devise wicked schemes are near,
but they are far from your law.
¹⁵¹ Yet you are near, Lord,
and all your commands are true.
¹⁵² Long ago I learned from your statutes
that you established them to last forever. 

A Loss for Words

We've been home from sunny (well, sunny for one day) California for 5 days now and I've been putting off writing some sort of reflection.  Not because I don't want to, but I'm truly at a loss for words.  I have no clue how to capture our experience.  
   The atmosphere. 
      The people. 
         The speakers. 
            The thousands of hearts for orphans. 
               The wonderful organizations.  
                  The music and time of worship.
                     The time with my hubby. 
                        And on and on.

Honestly, I'm at a loss.  So instead, I'm going to share some of my favorite quotes or points from the awesome speakers and let them do my thinking...

The Bible is clear about caring for orphans...AND it tells us to DO what is SAYS.
God will be blessed if you are a DOER.
James 1:27=private purity+public charity
--Dennis Rainey

The Gospel is focused on justice.  The Gospel is the reason WHY--our source of deliverance--which should be lived in the verb form.
We need to bring them (orphans) home and demonstrate the TRUTH of the Gospel.
--Crawford Loritts

How do we communicate the truth??
We must make grace TOUCHABLE (word became flesh).
Loving orphans is making the gospel visible.
--Jedd Medefind

The gospel moves us to declare it AND demonstrate it.
Caring for the broken and fatherless is the best way to display the gospel.
One cannot be walking too closely with Jesus without thinking about and wanting to reach out to the less fortunate.
--Jason Kovacs

How can we be so casual about this (orphan care) if this is true religion (James 1:27).
A lot of our lives just don't make sense with the scriptures. 
If you believe the Bible then how can you live the way you are? (Mat 25:40)
--Francis Chan

Ask yourself, "Who will take care of my children when I die." 
You wouldn't want "orphanage" to be your answer.  You'd want a mom and dad that would love them.
Home+Church=answer to orphan needs

• We cannot just help orphanages and give the children things....but must unite the children with LIFELONG FAMILIES
• We cannot just educate and medicate....but CURE
• We cannot just find a shelter for them...but a HOME
• Our goal must not be to work on the crisis but to END the crisis
• There are 168 million orphans and 2.4 billion Christians....YOU DO THE MATH

--Rick and Kay Warren

All those notes alone are too much to take in and wrap your mind around.  Then add in all the breakout sessions we attended (multicultural family, orphan ministry, missional living, etc), the hundreds of booths of organizations with ministries toward orphan care, the SUPERB music/worship, and the insight from all the great families we met. 
Summit
was
A-M-A-Z-I-N-G 

I've said it before and I'll say it a million times more....when we started this journey we had no clue how much God would reveal to us.  We had no clue how much our lives would be changed.  We are not adopting or doing foster care to get a pat on the back.  We are not doing it to be part of a "fad."  We are doing it to do what God told us to do and to do what HE does for US. 

What's a post without a few photos?!?!?

 

Addy Update!!!

Bobby and I arrived in cool CA today!! We left Bismarck at 5am and got here by 10am.  After a quick drive to Lake Forest we grabbed a quick lunch, stopped at a few shops and YUMMY Yougurtland then headed to check in to our hotel...the first thing we did was turn on the heat--yes us North Dakotans visiting CA in May:)

Then we plopped on the bed for a quick snooze and I woke up to my phone vibrating a new email....PHOTOS OF OUR SWEET AFRICAN PRINCESS!!!!!!!!!

It gives this mommy and daddy great comfort to see that cute face...and GROWING girl!! We can tell she is well cared for and she looks so content and comfy!

Thank you to my dear friends who sent me messages the last two days as I have been struggling with the wait! Your support means so much and I've been refreshed by you all and God giving me a sigh of relief seeing her updated photos!!!!

Psalm 130

I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in His word I put my hope. My soul waits for the Lord more than watchman wait for the morning....put your hope in the Lord's unfailing love and with Him is full redemption.

Our Addy Rose, we love you so much and will wait for God's gift of bringing you home...but continue to pray fervently that we have you in our arms SOON!

Getting By...

I told myself a few weeks ago the next time I posted would be me posting new pictures of our sweet Addy....nope.

This waiting game is TOUGH.  Most days I get by just fine with our day to day happenings and knowing we will have Addy home soon...but today has been hard...actually one of the toughest days yet.  I've found myself biting my lips countless times to kick back the tears.  We received our referral 6.5 weeks ago...and the photo we have was probably taken a couple weeks before we received her info...that means 2 months of infant life we are missing out on completely--like it's not enough that all we have is a photo!!  How big is she now?  Is she growing much?  What does her sweet face look like (we've only seen a side profile)?  Is she healthy?  (and those are just the questions about her physical appearance!).

Today I went through clothes and washed and put away all the 6-12 month baby girl clothes!!!  It was soooo emotional for me!!  Remembering Ayla wearing them and many great memories...plus the added emotions of imagining Addy wearing them!  Ayla was right by my side the entire time and was just squealing with delight!  Unfortunately last summer when we had our fundraising garage sale I got ride of 90% of our baby girl clothes under 12 months (at that time we were preparing for our Ethiopian blessing and knew they would be at least 12 months when coming home).

Anyway...a few other updates from the past week!

Some of my girlfriends and I are doing an after-bed-time discussion on 7: An Experimental Mutiny Against Excess.  Don't read it.  That is, unless you want to really discover yourself, your idols, where you time/money is going, and how the luxuries of this world cripple our faith.  It's an eye-opener.  I've thoroughly enjoyed (enjoyed doesn't quite fit this one) reading it with these wonderful ladies....but this week we decided to challenge each other.  For two weeks I am watching NO TV and only spending 30 mins on the computer a day--WHILE the kids are sleeping or resting--no wasting my time with my kiddos for stalking people on FB or lingering around adoption blogs. The 30 minutes is HARD when this mommy feels so alone today.   

(If there are typos in this post, blame the experiment--my fingers are going as fast as they can!)

(more of the 7 experience on a later date!)

We haven't officially broken ground, but we did get some dirt last week!  Our site work (getting the hill ready for a house) will be done this week while we're in CA and then next week or so we'll get the excavation going!!!!!!  The kids LOVE LOVE LOVE it out in the country and I CANNOT WAIT to have our family grow out there!!! 

Last weekend I spent AN ENTIRE day moving the kids' rooms around.  Ayla used to have the green room (which so cutely matched her comforter and even had white trim to match her furniture).  With the addition of Addy we had to decide what to do with the rooms before our house will be done...about 9 months from now.  The only solution was to move Eli and Owen to the small room and put Ayla and Addy in the larger room. 

It's taking all I've got to not paint the rooms, the trim and the crib!!  BUT (again through the messed up 7 book) I've realized some of MY priorities in life just shouldn't be priorities...Ayla and Addy can have two colors of furniture in their plain tan room (and ugly brown trim) AND the boys' green walls don't TOTALLY clash.  I will be JUST FINE. 

Tomorrow night Bobby and I leave for the Summit VIII conference in Orange County, CA!!  We are SUPER excited about the conference...Steven Curtis Chapman, Frances Chan, Dennis/Barbara Rainey, Rick/Kay Warren and MUCH MORE!  We look forward to connecting with other adoptive parents and ministry leaders and are excited to have some time together!  The last trip we took alone outside of Dickinson was in December 2010...it'll be nice!

Please continue to pray for Addy (and us).  We're waiting right now to hear about our court date and judgment.  It's estimated that once we get our judgment we'll travel about 8 weeks later!  We could have Addy in our arms as soon as JULY!!!!!!!!!

(and yes, I'm praying we get an updated photo SOON--the unknowns are killing me and to just see how much she's grown would make this mommy sooooooo happy!).