Transformation

Our adoption story starts the year we were married...and through these past 7 years, we have been completely transformed. 

Our story isn't just a story of our DRC and Ethiopian adoptions...it's a story of God's unfailing love. 
You see, before I even knew the word adoption, God had already made a plan to adopt me into His family.  He made a promise that we would not be left as orphans.

John 14:18
I will not leave you as orphans, I will come to you.

Here is our story of transformation...

Some of you may know/remember that when Bobby and I were first married, we were DEFINITELY not living for the Lord.  Our marriage was UGLY!  Our first year of marriage was TOUGH.  We were dealing with so many ugly situations, and we didn't go to God for His support.  On top of the marital spats (which were more than spats) and the drinking issues (giving up "college" life for "serious marriage" life) we were also dealing with infertility issues. 

After about 6 months of doctor appointment after doctor appointment, we moved to CO to start fresh.  It was a wonderful move for the two of us....a fresh start and time to grow as a couple.  We continued to see a fertility specialist (after being told right before we moved that it looked like we were not going to be able to have kiddos).  Our new doctor was hopeful, and said to give it a few months of "his" method before we look into other options.  Four months later we had really given up hope as my eggs were showing absolutely no signs of maturing into anything that could become a child!

At about this time Bobby and I started to consider adoption, as I'd always had adoption on my heart.  We started researching agencies and talking about what it could mean for us (after all, adoption could take years and we didn't want to wait a long time to welcome children into our home).

THEN, right after our 1 year anniversary, we found out we were EXPECTING!  We quickly decided it was time to move back to MT to be closer to family.

 

Fast forward a few years....and there we were living in MT with not only our first born, Eli, but our second child, Ayla.  We were happy, content, and doing great.  During this time we found a church home, but it was only a home to us on Sundays.  I'll never forget the night our pastor came over for some discussion with us to join the church.  We started getting into a conversation in which we needed a Bible....and Bobby and I had NO CLUE where our Bible was! 

Both of us group up in Christian homes and had even began going to church regularly since Eli was born. BUT, we still were not living as Christ followers and neither of us could really explain our faith to anyone and I will be daring to say neither of us really knew Jesus.  Neither of us had ever made the PERSONAL commitment to truly follow Jesus.

Then, another unexpected turn of events.

In September of 2008 we decided to move back to ND...it was so crazy how we truly felt God (which we didn't fully understand was God at the time) telling us to "go"!  We both had been having dreams and constant thoughts about "going".  We just didn't know what all these thoughts and dreams meant!  It took us some time to realize a move to ND was in store for us (because after all, we were content and happy in MT).   And through this move, we were completely transformed.

 

You see, I've always been a pleaser.  Growing up I often put on a good front, acting however I thought the person in front of me wanted me to act.  Whether it was my parents, my pastor, my teachers, my friends.  I've always wanted to do right....but I often fell short of doing right and then tried putting on a front.

It was no different in our marriage.  I would go to bed at night and "secretly" pray....because heaven forbid I actually let my HUSBAND (you know, the person that should know me best) know I prayed to the God I believed was somewhere out there.  I "secretly" wished we would be more involved in a church and even felt like God was telling me there was more to my "religion."  But of course I dare not share those crazy feelings with my hubby.

When we moved back to ND (our third state and sixth house in six years) we had no clue GOD was going to transform our lives and give us a fresh start.  It was no magical happening or a perfect church or pastor or friends...it was all God pushing us to become closer to Him and encouraging us to find a relationship with Christ.  It was the two of us learning how to have a relationship with Him through reading His word (which meant not only owning a Bible, but READING it) and conversation with Him through prayer.  It was a transformation of realizing that we had to put off our "old selves" and be renewed.

Ephesians 4: 21-24
You have heard about him and were taught in him, as the truth is in Jesus, to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness.

Fast forward a few more years and here we are today....with three beautiful biological children (plus a miscarriage), one beautifully adopted child from the Congo (who is ALMOST home), and one more child from Ethiopia on their way (through adoption).  We continue to grow every single day and learn more and more about the people God wants us to be!

Ephesians 2: 8-10
For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, and not a result of works, so that no one may boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.

A year and a half ago we felt God telling us His plan was for us to add to our family through adoption.  It's an absolutely beautiful journey that God brought us on....one of finding Him as our Father....one learning about our Savior, Jesus....and one learning that we were adopted as sons as daughters through Him into a heavenly kingdom. 

Ephesians 1:5
In love he predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to his purpose and will.

As hard as the first couple years of our marriage were, I can look back now and see God's handiwork at play the entire time!  God has used so many people to reach out to Bobby and I...so many people who probably don't have a clue how much they have affected us--starting with our parents and the early foundations they set in our homes that we locked away until we were ready to accept them!  

I cannot imagine what it would have been like to have adopted a child without it being a calling from God. I cannot imagine what it would have been like to go through this roller coaster without Him by our sides (like 6 years ago when we were first considering adoption). 

A week ago we thought we'd be on a plane traveling to get Addy....but God had other plans.  Even though we don't fully understand right now why our case is going through all these trials, we know God has a purpose and we are certain on of the reasons is to grow our trust in Him. Through this transformation and adoption, I've been trying really hard to be obedient to what God is calling me to do. 

This weekend I chose to get baptized as a believer.  I was baptized as an infant....and I am very thankful for that.  I am thankful for my parents who held me as a tiny child and promised to raise me in a Christian home.  But this weekend I had the opportunity to give a public testimony to the work God has done in me.  A testimony of the transformation He has made in me....and a testimony that I am choosing to follow His ways.  Yes, there will be sin and trials, and temptations along the way.....but oh how great it is to know my personal Savior and to be able to share my story with others!

Ephesians 5:8b-9a
Walk as children of light and try to discern what is pleasing to the Lord. 

I pray that God will use Bobby and I to encourage and love others along the way....

We love because He first loved us!